Playing With Dick and Jane

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Encounter 2, Part I: Trick or Treat?

Posted on Monday 5 November 2007

It’s fast approaching Halloween and we’re still jonesing to play. Problem is, we have a costume party we promised some old friends that we would attend.

Halloween is the second best party of the year at the club (apparently) and we are really thinking about going. We hear from Sally and she can’t find any “pals” to go to the club with her.

This sparks some debate and we think more strongly about going, if only to get Sally to lick Jane’s pussy. We figure the vanilla party will be breaking up around 10pm, so we still have plenty of time to go play.

Jane loves Halloween and I really don’t care for it. I always pick an uncomfortable costume and end up taking it off halfway through the night, which is the plan anyway if we go to the club.

I grudgingly agree to wear a costume. ;)

We end up dressing as pirates after Jane finds a sexy (and pretty classy) pirate wench costume and a matching pirate dude outfit for me. It is actually comfortable and fits properly.

We look so cute when we arrive at the vanilla party.

And the party sucks.

I have thrown a lot of parties in my day and there are four things that make a party fun:

  1. Good guests
  2. Good music
  3. Alcohol (or other intoxicating items)
  4. Hot Girls

This party had none of those things (except #3). I’m honestly ashamed for the hosts – there is no music (the DJ did not show up), no food (except some chips & salsa) and nobody looks like they are having fun. It’s a bunch of people sitting around in costume, drinking beer and talking.

Boooooo!

No hot chicks, either. Except Jane and our neighbor Rachel, who is wearing a bare midriff cheerleader outfit and these high-heeled saddle shoes that are just porn star hot. She has had a few beers and is overtly friendly towards me, since her husband is not there.

Uh oh. What the hell, do I just radiate something all of the sudden?

We beat a hasty exit after about 45 minutes and call Sally while en route to let her know we’re on the way. She is also getting ready to head out to the club, so the timing couldn’t have been better. We see her walking in as we pull into the parking lot.

Nice. I’ll have a girl on each arm. I should have dressed as a pimp…

The vibe in the club was very different this time around. There are no “Beautiful People.”

Where could they be?

I really don’t care.

We claim the corner of the room typically occupied by the Beautiful People. Jane has morphed into the de facto social director, talking and flirting with everyone who walks by. We are very popular tonight and have a little clique of our own forming around us.

Except our clique is inclusive, assholes.

We are bouncing around the room and being friendly and flirty with everyone. We are really having a great time tonight. There are a lot of sexy, fun costumes here.

We’ve also been chatting with another couple at the swinger site for a while. They stood us up last time we came to the club, so we aren’t expecting them to actually show. We are surprised when they approach to say hello. The wife is cute and very nice, but her husband is so drunk that he can barely put together a complete sentence. He is being belligerent and a little obnoxious and his wife is continually rolling her eyes at his antics.

Apparently, he had six drinks before they even got to the club and had continued throwing down since they arrived.

I can sympathize, since we’ve been there. But, I smell a fight on the way home for these two…

We had another surprise: The gorgeous older woman and her flyboy husband are back! For our purposes, we’re just going to nickname them Belle and Flyboy.

Belle is looking better than ever and is very flirty with both Jane and I. We were so nervous (and scared) the first time we met them that it’s a wonder that she remembers us at all. But apparently, we did make a decent impression, because she proceeds to invite us to their house (a 3 hour drive) for a big sex party.

I hope we get to play with them tonight – she’s giving us both “the eye.” I want to suck on those amazing tits. Unfortunately, they brought friends up with them and they all eventually end up in one of the private rooms. If we don’t make it to their party, I hope we get to play with them at some point.

Jane even got past her mustache issues and is willing to give the hubby a shot!

I am feeling pretty good about the whole evening so far: We both look great, are being flirty and social and having a lot of fun so far. Then, I am keenly aware of another pirate who enters the room.

Basically, compared to this guy, I look like the fucking cabin boy. The Cap’n (as he will be known) is dressed to the nines. His costume is fucking incredible – replica guns and knives, a real leather mug and a little brown jug of spiced rum, a shaved head, lots of pirate jewelry and tattoos.

His hat, a great example of what a “real” pirate hat looks like (complete with feather headdress), probably cost more than my entire outfit.

He eyes us as he walks by and I give him the “guy nod” which prompts him to approach on his next pass. I bow humbly to his superior costume, looking like Wayne and Garth when they meet Alice Cooper.

I am not worthy.

He proceeds to give Jane a string of beads with a clip on the end and puts it in her hair. He gives her a little kiss afterward and tells her he thinks she’s beautiful.

He is blatantly hitting on my wench!

And Jane likey.

He offers me a shot of spiced rum and I accept. I better get something out of this deal.

Ahh, liquor and jewelry, the way through me and into my wife’s pants…

The Cap’n continues hanging around with our group, getting more and more amorous towards my wife. Sally has been up my ass all night, even acting a little jealous when I flirted with some other women (including the Southern Belle). Several of the women from the other couples we are hanging with just simply don’t get the dynamic between Jane and I.

“He just put his arm around her and whispered in her ear!” they say to Jane.

“He just patted her ass and she gave him a kiss!” they say again.

“He has already fucked her, so what’s the big deal?” Jane tells them, matter-of-factly.

There are even prudes in the club! What the hell are these people even here for?

Then, the unthinkable happens: Sally has an awkward moment with a guy she has met outside the club. He’s nerdy, kinda shy and not very good looking. He is obviously fascinated with Sally. They talk for a while, but she is not interested at all.

He’s very nice, but I already know we are going have to rescue her from this poor guy. He hovers around our little group for a long time – Sally gives him the brush off and he’s not getting the hint. Even though he’s welcome to hang out with us, Sally does not want to play with him (and neither do we).

When it’s time to play, Jane and I formulate a game plan – I go out for a smoke and Jane grabs Sally to “go to the bathroom with her” and we rendezvous in the locker room, sans geeky guy.

Our clique is inclusive. Our bed is not.

I have had no liquor this evening (except the shot of rum). I’ve stuck to beer only and I’m glad. I have a nice buzz from the weed/beer combo and I’ve literally been standing here semi-erect all night long. No performance issues this time around.

Right?

Right…

Next: Encounter 2, Part II: All About Jane

Dick @ 11:00 pm
Filed under: Couples and Exhibitionism and Sex and Sex Club and Swinging
Sugasm #104

Posted on Monday 5 November 2007

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #105? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
Awkward Sex Attempts (and Other Common Experiences)

“This put a slight damper on the “sexy” feelings I was trying to work up.”

Do You Want Me To Call You A Whore?

“Who doesn’t like having their hair pulled during sex?”

Two Fer

“Neither of us heard the front door open when Jason’s roommate came home.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Girls and Guns

Editor’s Choice
Being a Feminist in the sex industry

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Go Ahead. Label Me
Oldie But Goodie - Altoids And Blow Jobs
Short and Sexy?
Why Doesn’t My Wife Want to Have Sex with Me Anymore?
Why I HATE the Term “Cuckold”

BDSM & Fetish
Always Your Slut Part 2
Angela-la Cake - Bloggers getting sweaty
Different
Fucking machines
Story: The Perils of Drink
Straight Boy Gets Fucked in the Ass
Unmasking
Who Doesn’t Dream About She Males?

Sex News & Reviews
Kumi Is A Yummy Fetish Model
NEW Bold & Sassy Designs!

NSFW Pics & Videos
Angelina Crow - Peep Show
Annette Schwarz (updated)
Catalina loves HNT (Bondage Tape)
Exotic Bloom
If I had a clone…
Merry Samhain!
More Naked Lazer Bunny Hotties

Erotic Writing and Experiences
All About the Tricks
Ancient and Debauched
Backdoor Love
Cream for my Coffee?
The dangers of blogging
First Encounter
The first time: Having sex with my wife.
I dreamed of Margene
New Beginning
Sex Report: Poolside Follies
The six days of halloween
“Smokin Ass” or Halloween Remembered
Touching

Dick @ 6:57 pm
Filed under: Sugasm
Getting Antsy

Posted on Friday 2 November 2007

It has been a couple of weeks since we played and, with all of the additional attention we’ve been getting online, we are starting to get the itch to play again.

We do another video shoot and this one goes much better. Jane is wearing a sexy little outfit and we actually light our bedroom appropriately. She does a little dance and starts rubbing her pussy, just like a good little amateur porn star. ;)

We have all of our toys laid out on the bed and, after fingering her pussy for a while, she grabs a vibrator and starts working her pussy into a wet, sloppy mess.

At one point in the footage, you can literally hear her juices sloshing around.

Rowr!

I am playing cameraman and loving every second of this. My dick is so hard, it could cut glass. After she gets off for maybe the third or fourth time, she moves over to me. It is very difficult to keep the camera steady and properly aimed when receiving a blowjob, but I fight through the urge to drop the camera and ravage her.

We end up with some good footage.

We don’t need a third for sexual purposes – we need a cameraman girl.

The video ends up coming out really well – the lighting was good, Jane looked sexy as hell and my cock should be up for an Oscar. ;)

All of this definitely pleases our unicorn, who is very turned on by the whole display and reciprocates with yet another video of her own.

Later that evening, she sends me an IM complaining about a computer disaster. I know a thing or two about the black box under my desk and try walk her through fixing it. She is using her Blackberry to IM and it’s just not working.

After convincing her that this is fruitless over IM, I persuade her to give me her number so I can just talk her through it – much easier that way.

And I hear Susan’s voice on the other end of the line. She’s real and very happy to hear from me. After about thirty minutes, we manage to get her computer working again and she spends the next hour effusively thanking me and promising to make it up to me.

I can think of a way…

I have spent a lot of time chatting with Susan and I think I’ve gotten to know her pretty well by now. She’s seen us dressed and naked (as have we) and we get along swimmingly in chat.

I already consider her a friend, which is really unusual considering we’ve never met in person and have only talked on the phone once. She’s extremely smart, smart-ass and has a great sense of humor.

If I don’t fuck this up, we could have a regular thing going with this girl.

Jane, on the other hand, has started to act less and less enthusiastic about having a threesome. This worries me on three levels:

  1. I thought that’s why we started doing this.
  2. I have put a lot of work and effort into wooing Susan.
  3. I thought that’s why we started doing this.

Jane explains that she was really disappointed about Sally not reciprocating her affections and that she really enjoyed the two couple dynamic because nobody got left out.

I’m fine with sharing my wife, but this kind of caught me off guard. I figured she would tolerate swinging in order to be with another girl, not prefer it!

This is leftover guilt from the fact that I got the better end of the deal when we played and she is still a little resentful.

I am experiencing some jealousy, too. Jimmy is a big guy and, prior to me, Jane had, for the most part, always dated big, dumb, lunkheads. He’s not stupid like most of her former beaus, but that makes him all the more threatening to me. Andy wasn’t threatening to me at all – he was a lot smaller than me in height and other relevant measurements, so he wasn’t a (physical) threat in my eyes.

This guy, in spite of the fact that we are both happily married, is interested in Jane and aggressively pursuing her, to boot.

And I don’t even know if his wife is into me, so why the hell am I worried? Why am I worried anyway?

Over the next few nights, we chat more with Jimmy and Janet and find out that, in spite of her lack of signals, she did like me a lot. It turns out that Janet is totally submissive and shy when it comes to sex and John is the dominating one. An odd (to me, but probably very common) dynamic.

She just is not assertive at all. I, on the other hand, will not make a move until I get something resembling a sign from a girl. Hence, our stalemate and my confusion.

I can dominate this chick if that’s what she wants…

We have been un-Godly busy over the last couple of weeks, leaving very little time for anything other than day-to-day life and the occasional nookie session with Jane. We have been working to get some of our (minor) financial issues straightened out and all that pressure has taken its toll on our sex life.

Outside of our video shoot, we really haven’t had any knockdown, dragout fuck sessions in a while. Once things calm down, Jane starts talking about playing again soon.

Jimmy and Janet have been wanting to meet us again since our first date and we just haven’t had the time (or money) to be gallivanting around town flaunting our sexual desires, but we finally break down and make a date with them a couple of weeks in advance.

There’s always a chance Susan will want to play (or meet) before we see them again, but it’s clear they want to play and we know we’ll need a full evening to get it on with these two.

Susan is also “schedually-challenged” since she has a very demanding job (and a family to take care of, too). We’ve been trying to nail her down to meet for a drink, but weekends are bad for her and weekdays are bad for us.

We will make the time, damn it.

Next: Encounter 2: Trick or Treat?

Dick @ 9:34 pm
Filed under: Couples and Exhibitionism and Swinging and Unicorns
Sugasm #103

Posted on Tuesday 30 October 2007

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants.

This Week’s Picks
Urgent

“Feel the electricity from my fingers as I peel the damp cotton of your panties away from your sex, as I ease them to one side.”

The Man From Del Monte Says…Yes, Yes, Oh God! YESSS!

“She let her lips and tongue explore me all over.”

Traveling the road, Sharing a load, Side by side

“I guess this is not very sexy, my ranting about politics while playing with your cock.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
The US Constitution Erotic Coloring Book

Editor’s Choice
Dinner Date: Part 1

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Sex Poetry
It’s about priorities…
Orgasm - O-Vision

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Fantasy Football
Halloween…
In Need - Original Illustrated Erotica
Indian Summer
New Underpants
The Pied Piper
Tight
Touch Me Babe
A walk in the Woods

Sex & Politics
Love Your Body
Abstinence Only Sex Ed On the Ropes?

NSFW Pics & Videos
Emilia
Happy HNT!
HNT the Menstrual Edition
I Feel Myself
Sinful Invitation
Sugar and Spice

Sex News & Reviews
2257 No More? Let the amateur porn flow!
Asian Woman Bound, Tickled and Forced To Cum
DamNation w/ The Reverend Bob Levy
NEW Super Sexy Designs!
Sex Toy Review : Under the Bed Restraints
Welcome to “Birds are smart” by Penny

BDSM & Fetish
Anal Training Part 2 -The Entering
Anniversary Present: A Fantasy
Cyber or real!?
Disobedience
Don’t stop until I stop you
Face Slapping II
Flying
Hand Signals
L is for Look it Up
The Petting Zoo: Sex Camp, Day Two
Princess or Pervert?
Stiletto Mistress

Sex Work
Reality Check: Getting Sick

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
The Disclosure Dilemma
HNT - Half Naked Thighs
I Want to Fuck All of My Friends
A Prelude to an Eclectic Slut
Some Things Are Not Possible
Why was the sex so good?
Why We Aren’t Really Swingers (part 1)

Dick @ 9:14 pm
Filed under: Sugasm
Stood Up?

Posted on Sunday 28 October 2007

We enter our second potential encounter with a lot more confidence. We have not one, but two dates set up for tonight and, if things work out with the first couple, our second date may just have to wait.

First on the agenda are The Hotties. We chatted with them earlier in the week and, even though they are quite a bit younger than us, they seemed to be into it.

We head out to our agreed meeting place and arrive a few minutes early. No sign of them yet, so we settle into a booth and order drinks.

The appointed time approaches and there is still no sign of The Hotties.

So, we wait. We order some appetizers and another round of drinks.

Still no Hotties. I call his cell phone – of course no answer. I leave a friendly voicemail and return to our table.

And…nothing.

We are starting to get pissed.

We wait another 15 minutes and I call again, this time leaving a message that is not quite as nice, but still not angry.

On top of it all, our waiter screws up the order, bringing us the wrong dipping sauce. This would not normally be a big deal, but after three tries, he can’t get the sauce right. Jane calls the manager over and basically reams his ass.

My wife is not a woman to be trifled with.

We get our appetizer free, pay for our drinks and leave a paltry tip for our idiot waiter. We both waited tables while working our way through college and typically overtip everywhere we go.

Not this time.

We get home and Jane is too angry to even think about going to our second date.

“They probably won’t show up either,” she snaps as I try to calm her down.

I notice that while we were gone, we’ve received an email. We check it out and, sure enough, The Hotties cancelled on us.

At 10:30 that morning. Plenty of time for us to realize that we didn’t have a date.

We are dumbasses.

I religiously monitor this particular email box and, the one day I don’t check it (since we already had two dates) we get something other than dating site spam.

This makes Jane feel a little better and she agrees to go meet the other couple for drinks.

I call Jimmy & Janet (date #2) and confirm our plans. They are en route to a bar that is situated on a barge docked on a nearby lake. We were already dressed for fun, so we didn’t have to get ready. We wait a bit (to make them nervous) and then head out to the bar.

We get there and I’m looking around – and don’t see them. We grab a drink, walk out on to the barge and wander around for a bit. I think I see them, but need confirmation from Jane.

“That’s them,” says Jane, tugging on my arm.

“Are you sure?” I ask, really not sure.

“Oh Jesus, you are such a pussy,” she snaps and walks over to the couple.

“Janet? Jimmy? Is that you?” she inquires.

“Oh cool, you guys showed up!” replies Janet, somewhat surprised that we were actually there.

Clearly, they have some experience at this.

We sit down and join them, sticking the girls next to each other and me directly across from Janet. They are both good looking, clean-cut and well-groomed.

And have all of their teeth.

Thank God.

Janet is a little heavier than Jane, but very pretty and curvy with great hair. Jimmy is a big guy, probably 6’2” and 235 pounds and very clean cut (which Jane likes). They are attractive, outgoing, bubbly and appear to be into us.

We hang out for several hours, chatting it up and trading stories. They have been swinging for a while, but have hit a dry spell lately. They used to have another couple they played with regularly, but that ended when the wife got a little bit too attached to them after her husband was deployed to Iraq.

They sound like a very good match for us: both are professionals, they have two kids around our daughter’s age and live in a nice, big house where they willingly volunteer to host. Heck, we could get the kids together, send them to bed early and have some fun without having to hire a babysitter.

It’s a match made in Heaven! Are these people actually normal?

Janet is hysterically funny, but not very assertive. I am simply not getting any kind of vibe from this girl.

A wink? Licking her lips? A punch in the arm? Come on!

Nothing. nada.

Jimmy is the complete opposite and openly kisses Jane when I step away to use the restroom. This is OK with me: Jane is a very attractive woman and we aren’t here to just make some vanilla friends.

Hell, I thought Jane looked great and would have done the same thing to Janet had I not detected that something wasn’t quite right.

We continue chatting and Janet continues looking more and clammy. She is not saying much, which is odd considering we couldn’t shut her up fifteen minutes ago.

Suddenly, she stands up and makes a beeline for the edge of the barge. She turns a ghostly white and leans over the railing.

I think we all know what happened next.

She can’t handle the rocking motion caused by some passing speedboats, apparently.

Jimmy goes to tend to his ill wife. Jane and I stand a few feet away, hoping that it wasn’t us that caused it. Or alcohol.

Janet is fine after a few minutes, but it is clearly time to wrap things up for the evening. Jimmy gives Jane a big hug and kiss. I cautiously lean in and, luckily, Janet has just eaten a Listerine breath strip, so I give her a hug and a kiss (on the cheek) and we go our separate ways, fairly confident we will see these two in the future.

“I am the worst swinger ever,” Janet admits to me while in my embrace. I squelch a fit of laughter, smile and nod - affirming her statement.

At least she knows it.

They liked us, we liked them and aside from a little motion sickness, the evening ended up a success.

Hope she doesn’t get motion sick while I’m fucking her…

On the way home, Jane starts messing with me, tracing her fingers along the outside of my pants all around my crotch. We finally make it back to the homestead and promptly head upstairs for some adult activities.

Jane gets out the toy box and discreetly tries to hide our new leather paddle under the pillow so she can use it on me while I’m on top of her later.

I am wise to this tactic.

I turn the tables on her while I’m fucking her from behind. I reach over and snatch the paddle out from under the pillow. Before she even realizes what I am doing, a sharp SNAP! echoes off the corners of our tile-covered bedroom. Three white stars (the pattern on the paddle) appear in a field of red on her ample ass.

“Oh yeah!” she cries as I continue my spanking frenzy, snapping her a couple more times.

“You liked when that guy kissed you tonight, didn’t you?” I ask/tell her.

“Yes.”

“You are a little whore, aren’t you?”

“Yes, but I’m your whore!”

“Yes you are. And when my whores kiss other men, they get punished.”

I grab her hair firmly and yank her head back, penetrating her almost all the way in one hard stroke. I typically can’t do this without hurting her and this time is no exception.

“OW! Fucker! Be careful with that thing!” she yells as I continue fucking her, a little more gently now and not nearly as deep.

I stick my finger in her ass after lubing it up with her wet pussy. I can feel my cock through the thin wall separating her vagina and anal cavity.

It feels pretty cool.

I don’t even begin to think I’m fucking her up the ass again so soon. She is opening up a bit when it comes to the idea of anal, but I still don’t want to push it.

Finally, she’s had enough. We flip over into missionary position and continue.

“Please cum for me,” she pleads and reaches for the bottle of lube on the nightstand. She squirts a little bit on top of my cock and we continue. I finally empty my load into her and collapse in a sweaty heap on top of her.

Jane just lays there basking in the afterglow - very unusual for her.

I love her new IUD. Except for when I can feel it touching poking the end of my cock when I fully penetrate her. Not pleasant. Not painful, but I can definitely tell it’s there.

Other than that, it’s great! For once, she’s not pushing me off ten seconds after I finish…

Next: Getting Antsy

Dick @ 1:02 pm
Filed under: Couples and Sex and Swinging and Unicorns